Calvin asks Mom if he can have a snack. She tells him yes. As he's walking off with the cookie jar in his arms and one in his mouth, Mom tells him he can have an apple or orange from the fridge. Calvin says they're both speaking English, but they're not speaking the same language.

Calvin and Hobbes are walking in the woods. Calvin is complaining that you can't enjoy autumn Sundays because you have to go to school the next day. The leaves changing color remind him that summer is over and school has begun. Hobbes likes this season best of all. He says the leaves are like nature's fireworks. As he continues saying how he likes the brisk air and the early evenings, he notices Calvin is fuming. He stops talking, and they walk along silently. Finally, Hobbes looks at the trees and describes the fireworks sounds. Calvin angrily reaches for some apples on the ground and tells Hobbes he didn't mention fresh applesauce. Does he like it?

Calvin starts opening a can. He hears rumbling, realizes what's about to happen, and covers his eyes. Hobbes comes slamming into him. Calvin angrily picks up a chunk and shows Hobbes he was opening a can of pineapple, not tuna. Hobbes tells him all cans sound the same.

Mom sees Calvin hiding behind a bush and asks what he's doing. He tells her to go away. He's going to throw some crab apples at Susie. Mom tells him no and makes him get rid of the crab apples. She says crab apples are hard and could hurt someone. Susie walks by and sees Calvin behind a bush and asks what he's doing. Calvin tells her to go away. He's going to throw a squishy old tomato at Mom.

Calvin tells Hobbes he wishes he had more friends, but people are such jerks. Calvin says if you can get most people to ignore you and leave you alone, you're doing good. If you can find one person you really like, you're lucky. He adds that if that person can stand you, you're really lucky. Hobbes asks what if you find someone you can talk to while you eat apples on a bright fall morning. They stop to eat their lunch. They sit up against a tree and eat their apples. Calvin supposes there's no point in being greedy.

Calvin looks into his lunch sack and tells it to open wide. He tells it this might cause some discomfort, as he prepares to reach inside. Calvin struggles with the bag, telling it to stop thrashing, he almost has it. He pulls out an apple. He says it's a good thing the bag had this removed. Calvin notes the bad spots. Susie has her head down next to her lunch thinking lunch shouldn't have to be like this.

Calvin tells Hobbes to pass the bag of rotten apples they've been saving. Susie is right below them. Hobbes asks about their war. Calvin tells Hobbes all charges are dropped. He's back in Calvin's club. Hobbes wants a promotion first. Hurriedly, Calvin tells him it's his. He tells Hobbes to give him the mushy apples. Susie asks what mushy apples. She asks again who he's talking to. Calvin tells her not to move.

Calvin throws apples at Susie while she runs off. Calvin declares their club a success. Hobbes thinks she's telling on them. Calvin says it was worth it. It was perfect. He tells Hobbes it's something they'll look back on with pride in their declining years.

Mom says Susie told her he was throwing mushy apples at her. Calvin says they were getting rid of slimy girls. That's their club. Mom says he better stop it. She tells him to come inside. As Calvin climbs down the rope, he says you can tell this is a great club because they always get in trouble following their charter.