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27 NOV 1987
What's the story you're going to read me, Dad? It doesn't have any romance in it, does it? Uh ... Edit it out if it does. I hate romance. Does it have any boring description in it? Well ... Skip it if you see any. I like my stories fast and gripping. It doesn't have a moral, does it I hate being told how to live my life. Skip the moral, too. Ok? Does his majesty prefer color pictures or black and white?
Dad is getting set to read Calvin a bedtime story. Calvin asks if it has romance in it. He tells Dad to edit any romance out. He asks if there is any boring description. He tells Dad to skip it if he sees any. He likes his stories fast and gripping. He asks about a moral. He doesn't like to be told how to live his life. He tells Dad to skip the moral, too. Dad asks if his majesty prefers color pictures, or black and white.
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Yukon Ho!The Authoritative Calvin and HobbesThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes


10 JAN 1989
Will you read this tonight? "An Ode To Tigers"? Hobbes wrote it. "The zebra's stripes are lacking hues, So they don't compare to you-know-whose."Orange, black and white is what to wear! It's haute couture for those who dare! It's camouflage, and stylish, too! Yes, tigers look the best, it's true!" This goes on? For pages. Pretty tedious, isn't it?
Calvin asks Dad to read "An Ode to Tigers" at bedtime. Hobbes wrote it. Dad reads the zebra's stripes are lacking hues, they don't compare to you-know-who's. It's camouflage and stylish, too. Yes, tigers look best. It's true. Dad asks if this goes on. Calvin tells him for pages. He asks Dad if he thinks it's pretty tedious.
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The Revenge of the Baby-SatThe Indispensable Calvin And HobbesThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes


29 OCT 1989
His stabilizers useless, his fuel about to explode, our hero careens out of control over a strange, unexplored planet! Yes, it's just another typical day for the incredible Spaceman Spiff! Zorched by Zarokes, Spaceman Spiff's crippled craft crashes on Platet Plootarg! Dazed but undaunted, our fearless hero sets off in search of a service station! Zounds! The zealous zarches have followed Spiff to the planet's surface to finish him off! With a sudden chill, our hero realizes the planet's soft granular ground makes him easy to track! Thinking quickly, Spiff runs backward, so his tracks show him going the opposite direction! By continuing past a hiding place and doubling back, our hero fools the hideous aliens! CALVIN! It's time to come in! We know he went this way. We'll find him.
Calvin asks Dad why old photographs are black and white. He asks if they didn't have color film back then. Dad tells him they did, but the world was black and white then. He says the world didn't turn color until the 1930's. Calvin says that's weird. Dad says truth is stranger than fiction. Calvin then asks why old paintings are in color. If the world was black and white, wouldn't artists have painted it that way? Dad says a lot of great artists were insane. Calvin asks how they could have painted in color. Their paints would have been shades of gray. Dad says the paints turned colors like everything else did in the '30s. Calvin then asks why old black and white photos didn't turn color. Dad says because they were color pictures of black and white. Later, Calvin tells Hobbes the world is a complicated place. Hobbes says whenever it seems that way, he takes a nap in a tree and waits for dinner.
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Scientific Progress Goes \The Indispensable Calvin And HobbesThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes


12 NOV 1989
Calvin suddenly realizes the world has no hue, value, or chroma! Have the photoreceptors in Calvin's eyes stopped working properly, or has the fundamental nature of light changed?? Perhaps some strange nuclear or chemical reaction on the sun has caused electromagnetic radiation to defy separation into a spectrum! Maybe objects no longer reflect certain wavelengths! Whatever the cause, it's clear to Clavin that there's no point in discussing things with his Dad! The problem is, you see everything in terms of black and white. SOMETIMES THAT'S THE WAY THINGS ARE!!
Calvin is dragging the sled, but there's no snow on the ground. Hobbes asks what he's doing. Calvin says he plans an appeal to the snow demons. He says they're tormenting them with wimpy weather because they're angry. Calvin is going to lie on his sled and think snow thoughts until the snow demons have mercy and unleash a blizzard. Calvin says a rhyme about it snowing. Hobbes looks at the sky. He walks away and says he'll come out in January to see how he's doing. Calvin tells him to let Mom know he'll need his meals out there and that he won't be going to school tomorrow.
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Scientific Progress Goes \The Indispensable Calvin And HobbesThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes


03 FEB 1991
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Calvin's world suddenly has no hue, value, or chroma. He asks if the photoreceptors in his eyes have stopped working, or has the fundamental nature of light changed. Perhaps something has caused electromagnetic radiation to defy separation into a spectrum. As he walks, he wonders if objects no longer reflect certain wavelengths. Whatever the case, it's clear to Calvin that there's no point in discussing things with Dad. Dad tells Calvin that his problem is, Calvin sees everything in terms of black and white. Calvin angrily replies sometimes that's the way things are.
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Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Snow GoonsThe Complete Calvin and Hobbes


19 SEPT 1993
Wow, honey, you're missing a beautiful sunset out here. I'll count to 10, and then... POW! Dad, how come old photographs are always black and white? Didn't they have color film back then? Sure they did. In fact, those old photographs ARE in color. It's just that the WORLD was black and white then. Really? Yep. The world didn't turn color until sometime in the 1930s, and it was pretty grainy color for a while, too. That's really weird. Well, truth is stranger than fiction. But then why are old PAINTINGS in color?! If the world was black and white, wouldn't artists have painted it that way? Not necessarily. A lot of great artists were insane. But... but how could they have painted in color anyway? Wouldn't their paints have been shades of gray back then? Of course, but they turned colors like everything else did in the '30s. So why didn't old black and white photos turn color too? Because they were color pictures of black and white, remember? The world is a complicated place, Hobbes. Whenever it seems that way, I take a nap in a tree and wait for dinner.
Calvin sees a dead bird. Calvin says once it's too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is. You realize life is fragile, and nature is ruthless. Calvin says you go on with your daily affairs, not thinking about it. He thinks that's why everyone takes the world for granted and act so thoughtlessly. He supposes it will all make sense when they grow up. They sit under a tree and watch birds flying.
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There\The Complete Calvin and Hobbes


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This page is strictly a tribute to Calvin & Hobbes, the best comic ever, and two of the best characters who have taught me so much over many years. It is meant for research purposes only.